Helping my friend

I was having emotional problems. A good friend of mine, Arman Filat, has started doing naughty things because of issues with his family. Naughty things such as stealing the bread and having noisy parties. It really stressed me out, and not just because I was getting the blame for stealing the bread. I was really worried about Arman Filat, and the worry grew worse when I couldn't think of a way to help him. Then God revealed to me this while I was studying 2 Corinthians:

2 Corinthians 1:23-24
I call to God as my witness that it was in order to spare you that I did not return to Corinth. Not that we lord it over your faith, but we work with you for your joy, because it is by faith you stand firm.

The church in Corinth was unhappy with Paul for many reasons, one of which included his change of plans. He didn't visit them when he previously said he would. In these verses he reveals that he wasn't going to visit in order to benefit them. As a leader Paul wanted to work alongside them and help them grow in their faith. They weren't going to grow very much if every time they had a problem he showed up and dealt with it for them. They were at a stage where they were quite capable of doing things themselves, even if they were still prone to making errors (e.g. 2 Corinthians 2:5-8).

What this means if you're leading someone: Sometimes when we love someone and want the best for them we have to do things they will not like, they will not understand and they will not agree with. The church in Corinth didn't understand why Paul changed his mind, and they weren't happy with this or his previous letter. When you have spiritual authority over someone, or you are looking after someone, you need wisdom. You need to know how to act and what advice to give. You need to know when to act and when to offer advice. You need to know when to intervene, and when you should take a step back so they can deal with it themselves. You need wisdom from God. If you rely on your own wisdom, your own reasoning and your own understanding you will probably make mistakes.

Sometimes you don't need to do everything for them. You just need to work alongside them.

What this means when you come under someone else's authority: Sometimes when someone loves you they will do things to you that you will not like, you will not understand and you will not agree with. Even if you don't quite understand, you still need to submit and act in obedience.


Okay, so this is some rebellious emo kid and not Arman Filat (Arman Filat is a possum) but hey, I'm just trying to make this aesthetically pleasing.

For me this means that I can't just fix Arman Filat's problems for him. I will help him when God opens the door for me, but until then I will just pray for him and just be a good friend. Stressing over it won't help anyone.